Kidnap movie rating and review

Kidnap movie posters :

Kidnap (2008) Movie Rating and Review :

Rating :

Acting – 4.5/10
Direction – 3/10
Screenplay – 3/10
Music – 3/10
Technique – 6/10

Review :

Big mistake, bhanjey!

There’s a scene in Kidnap where Minissha Lamba is looking at the computer screen and Imran Khan sitting next to her steals a glance at her cleavage. She notices the gaze. He squirms in his seat. You squirm in yours.

Kidnap Kabir, give us Jai Singh Rathore please. Forget the bulked-up torso, the intense stare and the clenched cheekbones, Imran Khan in Kidnap is the mamu of all miscasting. The discomfort is palpable in every shot, the dialogue delivery na ghar ka na ghaat ka, the demeanour almost apologetic. Come on, you cannot bring method mathematics to Sanjay Gadhvi’s mainstream masala.

And what if you are told that the miscast Imran is the best thing about Kidnap? Sad, but true! No wonder Aditya Chopra did not produce Kidnap in 2002 and instead had Gadhvi directing Dhoom and Dhoom:2 for him. Still, Gadhvi went ahead and made what he calls “a timeless script”. Sure it is one because regardless of the timing of the making, Kidnap would have always been a lousy movie!

Lousy because the reason of the kidnap is lame. Lousy because criminals like that are not moral--meters. Lousy because showing cleavage cannot conceal script loopholes.

Yes, there is cleavage galore in Kidnap. You don’t need to steal glances like Kabir the kidnapper.

First there’s Minissha Lamba who is 24 years old, plays a 17-year-old, looks like a 35-year-old and acts like a five-year-old. You wonder if this is the same girl who made you smile in Yahaan and Honeymoon Travels and Shaurya… You also wonder if her Sonia is a body double with Minissha’s face… Forget the bikini, she is doing a Victoria’s Secret commercial in every frame. What was promised as sensuous turns out to be boring after a point of time.

Vidya Malvade, best remembered as Chak De!’s goalkeeper, plays Minissha’s mother! Given her wardrobe — the top buttons of all her shirts and jackets are on a Puja holiday — she could have just played her daughter. There’s ‘Baby Doll Vol. 3’ Sophie who comes out of nowhere and makes sure she doesn’t cut into the costume budget of the film. Poor Reema Lagoo’s — saddled in the role of a nani(!) — sari could have draped all the three ladies!

And then there’s Sanjay Dutt, who clearly has the meatiest role in the film. Literally and figuratively. As the majboor baap, he is made to run, jump, drive, bike, climb and what not… And no, it’s not a pretty sight watching Sanju baba of 2008 go through the ordeal. His dialogues, of course, have the massy punch Gadhvi is striving for but there’s so much of flab that the physicality leaves no impact.

That’s the saddest part. Did such an action-packed script really demand the young boy versus old man combat? Because clearly this isn’t a Ransom or a Taken and the divorced-dad-in-distress dilemma was uncalled for. It would have worked much better with a simple man-versus-man routine like the Dhoom films.

Among the few redeeming elements in Kidnap are Allan Amin’s edge-of-the-seat action set-pieces and Bobby Singh’s moody camerawork. Pritam has an off-day once again with not a single song to take back home. Sandeep Vyas’s chartbusting Mit jaaye comes with the closing credits but it’s too late by then. Maybe Gadhvi can bring it up somewhere fast, like the Bhool Bhulaiyaa title track.

So, should you watch Kidnap for Imran? No and yes. No, because it may just kidnap all your Jaane Tu fantasies. Yes, because the effort’s there, the mystery intact and there are flashes of occasional brilliance.

But perhaps little Khan big should just be extra cautious about the kind of films and directors he wants to associate with. Because, after all, failure is right here, bhanjey!

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